Lashon Hara

Lashon Hara in the episode about the Snake enticing Adam and Eve

On the seventh day G- d rested, which brought in to existence the spiritual universe of Shabbat. Adam and Chava - the Human pair - were placed in the Garden of Eden, created on the sixth day, they were given one commandment by G- d, to not eat from the forbidden fruit of the "Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil,’ However the serpent encouraged Chava to eat from it and in turn she encouraged Adam to eat from it, thus they failed to keep the sole command to not eat from that tree. By absorbing "sin," Adam and Chava rendered themselves incapable of staying in the spiritual paradise of Eden and were banished. Death and hard work (both physical and spiritual) now entered the world, together with pain during childbirth. The serpent was also punished as the serpent encouraged Chava to sin, for eternity the serpent was cursed to crawl and eat from the dust in the ground.. When G-d asked them if they had transgressed, each of them, the serpent, Chava and Adam passed the blame on to each other. We learn from this how bad lashon hara is and enticing other people to slander can be. The Gemara argues that we must understand the evil of Lashon Hara to be equal to the combined evil of the three cardinal sins (idolatry, incest/adultery and murder). It is our job to control what we say about other people, as many individuals lives may be destroyed through cheap gossip, false accusations and baseless hatred, there is a concept that if two people are speaking bad behind someone’s back, the victim of the lashon hara is rewarded with all the mitzvah’s the slanderer and listener attribute and they in turn are credited with all the victims previous sins. When hearing lashon hara one should try and rebuke the speaker and explain to them why it is so bad, it is highly commendable to look at the good in other individuals as from this weeks reading we learn that we all come from ‘Adam’ originally and we were all made in the image of G-d, it is also commendable to judge people favorably and give the benefit of the doubt. Some sages comment that a person who speaks Lashon Hara about other people may be similar to a snake.

Disparaging a Torah Scholar

An area where unfortunately Lashon Hara occurs is when relating information about a person/group that learns Torah. If someone says, "He's not so learned, he only knows a limited amount of Torah," and thereby diminishes the other persons impression on the scholar, the speaker has committed a terrible violation of Lashon Hara.

Even if the information may be true [it is Lashon Hara] - for the very reason that he spoke was not for a constructive purpose, but rather to lower another from his level in the eyes of the listeners - since inevitably as a result of such conversations the subject will receive some sort of damage or at least endure suffering.

For example, a case could be, speaking against a community Rabbi in front of members of the community, saying that he does not have much Torah knowledge, but rather he knows just enough to answer the Torah issues that commonly occur within the community. Even if this may be true it is a complete disregard of the Torah prohibition against speaking Lashon Hara, for through his words the speaker completely reduces the honor of the Rabbi, which may very well result in the downfall of his career. Furthermore, the speaker also destroys the honor of the Torah and its observance.

Another situation could be speaking similarly against a newly married person living in one's city, for certainly that may ultimately undermine the respect given him by his in-laws and the members of his household when they learn that others in the city speak poorly of him - a man of little achievements. There is no damage greater than this form. It is pure Lashon Hara

In fact, there is an importance in honoring Torah scholars, even rising up for them when they enter the room. So one may not just be over the transgression of Lashon Hara but many other transgressions in the process.

Apologising to others about past Lashon Hara (Yom Kippur Message)

We are entering the festival of Yom Kippur (Day of Atonement), a festival in which we fast for 25 hours and beseech G-d to forgive us for all transgressions, Hashem may forgive all transgressions made against G-d, however one of the factors how one may gain repentance over the wronging of their fellow man, is through begging for forgiveness. One may have spoken Lashon Hara about another in the past, which is certainly bad, however that Lashon Hara they spoke, may have ruined the other person, many people may have looked at the victim in a much worse light, believing him to be a much worse person, in turn they may have stopped associating with him, for example not doing business with him and not socialising with him and many others would observe this and do the same, the innocent victim may have become for example, Bankrupt from this and socially driven out, when he actually did nothing wrong, all that happened was that someone spoke Lashon Hara and many other people accepted the information and acted in it. The person who initially spoke the Lashon Hara and was the source for causing all these problems, will not just have to beg by asking for forgiveness, he should also be required to financially restore the person back to the position he was in and try and socially make him the same person he was before, anything short of that may not be real repentance on the part of the man that initially spoke Lashon hara. We should all be really careful what we say about others and see the wide picture effect it can have on that person being spoke about!! One should not be shy to reprove others when it comes to speaking about others. Wish you all a meaningful fast, have a great Yom Kippur and Shabbat!! Michael Zaroovabeli from Ohr Sameach yeshiva in Jerusalem.

SHANA TOVA!! As we are in the month of Ellul, and Hashem is judging all of us, we are all striving for repentance and one of the main themes in this day and age of repentance is the transgression of Lashon Hara and Baseless Hatred. The Second Beit HaMikdash was destroyed because of sinat chinum (baseless hatred). The gemara argues that we must understand the evil of sinat chinum to be equal to the combined evil of the three cardinal sins (idolatry, incest/adultery and murder). Since our exile is still ongoing, and the Beit Hamikdsh hasn’t been rebuilt, we know that we haven’t fixed that sin. We must know that Lashon Hara and embarrassing someone is compared to murder. Thus we realize that Lashon Hara is also one of the reasons the Beit Hamikdash hasn’t been rebuilt. If we do introspection we will realize that Lashon Hara is a result of baseless hatred, not knowing how to tolerate and accept each other. Finding flaws in others makes us feel superior, and make us believe that we have the right to judge others. Judging others is a result of being arrogant, which is compared to idolatry. Who would be the idol? Yourself. If we were humble enough (to see our own flaws) we would appreciate people’s good qualities instead of finding flaws and we will be able to learn to forgive.

"Kamtza bar Kamtza" - from the Talmud, Gittin 56 A man wanted to throw a party for all his friends, so he drew up a guest list and instructed his servant to send out the invitations. One of the men on the guest list was named "Kamtza," but the servant made a mistake and invited "Bar Kamtza" instead. Bar Kamtza was actually a sworn enemy of the host. When Bar Kamtza received his invitation, he was very grateful thinking that the fight was over between him and the host. But when Bar Kamtza showed up at the party the host asked him to leave. Bar Kamtza appealed to him by offering to pay part of the party. He pleaded numerous times, he even said: "I'll pay for the entire party! Just please don't embarrass me in this way!". The host, however, stuck to his guns and threw Bar Kamtza out. No one in the party said anything to defend bar Kamtza. The Talmud reports that Bar Kamtza was so hurt and upset, that he went straight to the Roman authorities and gave slanderous reports of disloyal behavior among the Jews. This fueled the Romans' anger, and they proceeded to attack and destroy the Holy Temple (which also brought poverty and deaths among the Jews).

From this we can realize the power of embarrassing someone (which is a way of Lashon Hara). The host spiritually killed Bar Kamtza by embarrassing him, and ultimately it caused physical destruction as well. When Bar Kamtza went to the party he was happy because he thought the hatred among them was finally going to be over. However, the host’s arrogance (which is a form of idolatry) fueled the fight. This also made Bar Kamtza create lashon hara to the Romans about the Jews, he didn’t forgive him. No one in the party did anything to defend Bar-Kamza. Maybe they were afraid to say something, but that was like agreeing with the host. This is why R. Chafetz Chaim advises us to avoid places where there is Lashon Hara, and to rebuke those who do it. From something that we think is so small a whole tragedy aroused.

We haven’t been able to learn to appreciate Hashem’s creation. We were created Betzelek Elokim, thus we must realize every person is intrinsically good and has a holy soul. Since we don’t have the omnipotence that Hashem has, we are unable to read someone’s heart or mind, and guarantee things as facts. This is why we should always give the benefit of doubt and also forgive. G-d is superior to all of us, who are we to judge His creation? Furthermore, Hashem looks at the scale we use to measure others. And with that same measure, He measures us.


People who should not speak ‘Constructive Lashon Hara’ A person, who is going to relate information about another, should not say it, however constructive the information is, if he is also guilty of the same thing. For example, If a person witnesses another sinning and is just as bad as a sinner, sick with the same immoral behavior, it is forbidden to announce the incident. A person with similar transgressions does not have the intention of telling over the unknown out of goodwill and fear of G-d, but rather to derive pleasure from the disgrace of his fellow. This is derived from a verse in the Tanach in Hosea 1:4, "And I have accounted for the sins of Jezreel upon the house of Jehu." Jehu, was a Jewish king who fulfilled a mitzvah (positive commandment) by cutting off the house of Ahab (a King that caused widespread Idolatry in Israel) in Jezreel, for he was commanded by a prophet, and Jehu thereby was granted the kingship for four generations, as G-d told Jehu (Kings 2 10:30), "... as you have done to the house of Ahab according to what was in my heart, your fourth generation shall sit on the throne of Israel." However, G-d similarly gave out punishment upon the house of Jehu because he committed transgressions as Ahab had done. So, despite the fact that Jehu did initially eliminate the transgression of Ahab, he later on became guilty of the same transgressions as he caused idolatry also. It shows if someone is going to speak constructive Lashon Hara, they should not be guilty of the same sin and should later not do the sin of the man he himself spoke about, as he is proving he has not done it for love of G-d. He is just proving that he is a Hypocrite!

7 conditions needed in order to relate information about another

1. The speaker must have seen the incident he is relating himself, rather than hearing about it from a rumor.

2. The speaker should reflect thoroughly, not hastily making a conclusion that something is for example, theft or damage or any other crime, that the action in question is truly a violation according to Jewish law.

3. The speaker should first approach the transgressor privately and in a discreet manner, and rebuke him in a gentle manner, because perhaps this can have an impact and inspire the individual to improve his ways. If the transgressor does not hear, then the speaker should alert the public of the individual's guilt. If all the other factors are also being fulfilled!

4. The description of the sin should not be exaggerated; one can’t add at all to the Lashon Hara and relate any information untrue or not needed!

5. The speaker must have pure intentions. The speaker should in no way enjoy his friend's (the transgressor's) disgrace, nor act out of a previous hatred he felt for the person. He is not allowed to speak the Lashon Hara is he does not have pure intentions!

6. If the purpose of speaking the Lashon Hara (for example, causing the transgressor to repent, warning the community to stay away from such activity) can be achieved in another way rather than speaking Lashon Hara, the other method should be used, it is forbidden to speak Lashon Hara.

7. By speaking Lashon Hara, the transgressor should not be caused more damage than would be appropriate as determined by a court of Jewish law reviewing the case. One should not cause to much monetary damage by relating the information

Also one is not allowed to believe the Lashon Hara deep down and should only speak the Lashon Hara if he has 100% pure intentions and it has to be constructive and he should have nothing personal against the person he will be relating the constructive information against.


Also one is not allowed to believe the Lashon Hara deep down and should only speak the Lashon Hara if he has 100% pure intentions and it has to be constructive and he should have nothing personal against the person he will be relating the constructive information against.

Relating Information for beneficial puposes

There are times when a person is obliged to speak out against another, even though the information is going to be disparaging. Specifically, if a person’s intent in sharing the negative information is for a positive, constructive, and beneficial purpose, the prohibition against Lashon Hara does not apply. This may be in a case when going into a business partnership with a known thief and the other party is unaware of his reputation and the partnership in itself is likely to result in damaging monetary and credible status. However even when hearing the information and reconsidering the partnership, he should still not believe the information but may act on it in a non inflated way to protect himself. Making lies and spreading this information, is always prohibited. And if the Lashon Hara serves as a warning against the possibility of future harm, such communication is not only permissible, but, under certain conditions, compulsory. If a person witnessed another person wronging his fellow, maybe by theft or damage of property or injury - whether the wronged person is aware of the damage or theft or not - or by embarrassing him, and the witness are aware that the offending party did not make any restitution, even if he was the sole witness, he may discuss the incident with others in order to help the guilty party ( to repent and correct his ways) and also to publicly disparage such evil behavior. However there are certain conditions that have to be fulfilled when giving away constructive information about others. One has to know for sure and not only suspect about the information of the other, when relating the information he should have no ulterior motive or personal dislike for that individual. If the man spreads the information and their may be ulterior motives despite the person or party he is speaking about has that reputation, he should try and refrain from relating the information as his ulterior motive could lead him to speaking much Lashon Hara, which has severe penalties.

Two More Ways To React To Lashon Hara

In addition to the possible reaction presented in the first story, another two ways of reacting to lashon hara are presented by this parable. One reaction is silence. The other reaction is to change the topic.

1) Silence. In the context of lashon hara, silence indicates a few things. First, it is the opposite action to joining in with the lashon hara and piling on the unfortunate target. Second, silence – to those attuned to non-verbal communication – expresses disapproval and/or disagreement without saying so explicitly. Thus, there is an instant reaction - which prevents sinking further into the muckraking – without risking embarasshing the person who spoke ill of his fellow.

Note: This is dependent on the speaker being attuned to non-verbal communication and not just being oblivious, thinking perhaps that the silence is just rapt attention.

2) Changing the topic. This is another time-honoured tactic for avoiding uncomfortable discussiong and cutting them short once begun. In the above anecdote, the speaker himself changed the topic along with the other Rav.

Repentance for Speaking Lashon Hara

If someone violated the prohibition and spoke Lashon Hara against another man, and wants to repent from his sin, he has no way to do so until he first asks forgiveness, and apologieses to him. He must ask forgiveness from the person he spoke Lashon Hara against, and he must assuage the person he spoke to, since that Lashon Hara caused the listener to feel animosity against the subject also. If the speaker does go back to the listeners to convince them that he was mistaken in his information, he does not have to ask forgiveness from the subject. The speaker should also repent to Hashem for transgressing His commandment (Lev. 19:18 – Parshat Kedoshim), "Lo telech rachil b'ameicha - do not go about as a talebearer among your people." The person should beg totally for forgivness, however if the subject would feel bad that he was spoken against, and would ruin his confidence, it may be better not to say anything to him as they damage of relating what he said could be worse.

Consequences of Speaking Lashon Hara

People that speak Lashon Hara regularly (Balei Lashon Hara) are cut off not just from this world through speaking lashon hara, they are cut off from something else: olam habah (the World to Come). The Sages state in (Bab. Erchin 15b) that for 3 transgressions one loses his portion in olam habah: the three transgressions were murder, adultery, and idol worship, and the sages state that lashon hara is equivalent to all three. The Chafetz Chaim adds that when someone accustoms himself to speaking Lashon Hara, he rationalizes it to the extent that he starts to see Lashon Hara as entirely permissible. The comparison of Lashon Hara to well- established and agreed-upon transgressions such as murder is surprising. But at the same time, we can imagine why: just as the "Ten Commandments" sins damage and destroy essential physical aspects of the world, Lashon Hara afflicts the emotional and social realms. The first five commandments discuss man to G-d relationships and prohibitions whereas the last 5 commandments discuses the man to man laws, one that speaks Lashon Hara in turn could actually violate all 10 commandments!! Lashon Hara can cause problem with friendships, business relationships, bullying in school, problems in the work place and much more!!

Here is a short Dvar Torah due to very popular demand on why speaking and accepting Lashon Hara (slander) is so bad. One of the major transgressions throughout Jewish history is the sin of Lashon hara, it is considered very bad as it may destroy individuals/groups lives, leading to bullying in work place/ school, ruining businesses, bringing a bad reputation, destruction of friendships, wrecking a potential shidduch. Many people tend to stumble on the transgression about speaking Lashon Hara and unfortunately the strong desire about gossiping and speaking evil of others (whether true or not) is so high that gossipers/listeners do not realize they are committing a transgression which is considered as bad as the 3 cardinal sins. It is our job to try reprove and discourage people that speak slander about others whichever environment they may be in during the day. We learn in the Tanach that during the era of ‘King Achav’ (a man who instigated idol worship and caused numerous murders during his tenure) as King of Israel, he was successful in most of his battles, because one of the major merits he had was that his nation didn’t speak Lashon Hara about each other. However when the righteous King David was leader of the Jews, despite their being a flourish of Torah Scholarship in that era, Lashon Hara and Baseless Hatred was at a high rate, which led to Hashem helping King David’s army at a much lower rate when they went into battle in comparison to King Achav’s tenure. It has been stated that 24000 of Rav Akiva’s students died because they spoke Lashon Hara about each other and didn’t give each other the respect that they should have. Another major aspect in Lashon Hara is ‘ACCEPTING’ the Lashon Hara spoken. Many commentators have stated that the exile of the 10 tribes of Israel was initially caused due to King David accepting Lashon Hara, Here King David made the mistake of listening to and believing Lashon hara spoken by a greedy man of the name ‘Ziba,’ which in turn led to King David giving over half of a man’s rightful property (Mephibosheth), which should not have been given. In life there are loads of examples when a person or a group of people may start a rumour about someone and then the rumour in turn spreads like fire, many people may actually accept the rumour which may also not at all be true, leading to ruined reputations and they are severely guilty of the transgression of speaking and accepting Lashon Hara. We even learn in Parshah Korach (in book of Bamidbar), Dasan and Aviram wanted Moshe to be ousted out of his position as the leader of Jewish people, so there is a medrash that states they decided to start up a false rumour that Moshe had committed adultery, in order to seriously wreck his reputation. They realized that the moment one starts a rumor about another group or individual, the victim of the rumor will be finished. It is so hard to repent over the transgression of Lashon Hara, as in many cases the damage may be irreparable due to the slander that may have been spoken about the victim. Some commentators have stated that a person who speaks slander about another is considered similar to a ‘Snake.’ The Second Beit HaMikdash was destroyed because of sinat chinum (baseless hatred). The gemara argues that we must understand the evil of sinat chinum to be equal to the combined evil of the three cardinal sins (idolatry, incest/adultery and murder). Since our exile is still ongoing, and the Beit Hamikdsh (Temple) hasn’t been rebuilt, we know that we haven’t fixed that sin. We must know that Lashon Hara and embarrassing someone is compared to murder. Thus we realize that Lashon Hara is also one of the reasons the Beit Hamikdash hasn’t been rebuilt. If we do introspection we will realize that Lashon Hara is a result of baseless hatred, not knowing how to tolerate and accept each other. Finding flaws in others makes us feel superior, and make us believe that we have the right to judge others. Judging others is a result of being arrogant, which is compared to idolatry. Who would be the idol? Yourself. If we were humble enough (to see our own flaws) we would appreciate people’s good qualities instead of finding flaws and we will be able to learn to forgive.

The Chafetz Chaim advises us to avoid places where there is Lashon Hara, and to rebuke those who do it. From something that we think is so small a whole tragedy aroused.

We haven’t been able to learn to appreciate Hashem’s creation. We were created Betzelek Elokim, thus we must realize every person is intrinsically good and has a holy soul. Since we don’t have the omnipotence that Hashem has, we are unable to read someone’s heart or mind, and guarantee things as facts. This is why we should always give the benefit of doubt and also forgive. G-d is superior to all of us, who are we to judge His creation? Furthermore, Hashem looks at the scale we use to measure others. And with that same measure, He measures us.

"Kamtza bar Kamtza" - from the Talmud, Gittin 56

We are approaching the festival of Tisha B’AV, mourning the destruction of the two temples, the second temple was destroyed because of Lashon Hara and baseless hatred, below is a story that triggered the destruction of the second temple, through Lashon Hara and hatred.

A man wanted to throw a party for all his friends, so he drew up a guest list and instructed his servant to send out the invitations. One of the men on the guest list was named "Kamtza," but the servant made a mistake and invited "Bar Kamtza" instead. Bar Kamtza was actually a sworn enemy of the host. When Bar Kamtza received his invitation, he was very grateful thinking that the fight was over between him and the host. But when Bar Kamtza showed up at the party the host asked him to leave. Bar Kamtza appealed to him by offering to pay part of the party. He pleaded numerous times, he even said: "I'll pay for the entire party! Just please don't embarrass me in this way!". The host, however, stuck to his guns and threw Bar Kamtza out. No one in the party said anything to defend bar Kamtza. The Talmud reports that Bar Kamtza was so hurt and upset, that he went straight to the Roman authorities and gave slanderous reports of disloyal behavior among the Jews. This fueled the Romans' anger, and they proceeded to attack and destroy the Holy Temple (which also brought poverty and deaths among the Jews).

From this we can realize the power of embarrassing someone (which is a way of Lashon Hara). The host spiritually killed Bar Kamtza by embarrassing him, and ultimately it caused physical destruction as well. When Bar Kamtza went to the party he was happy because he thought the hatred among them was finally going to be over. However, the host’s arrogance (which is a form of idolatry) fueled the fight. This also made Bar Kamtza create lashon hara to the Romans about the Jews, he didn’t forgive him. No one in the party did anything to defend Bar-Kamza. Maybe they were afraid to say something, but that was like agreeing with the host. This is why Rabbi Chafetz Chaim advises us to avoid places where there is Lashon Hara, and to rebuke those who do it. From something that we think is so small a whole tragedy aroused.

We haven’t been able to learn to appreciate Hashem’s creation. We were created Betzelek Elokim, thus we must realize every person is intrinsically good and has a holy soul. Since we don’t have the omnipotence that Hashem has, we are unable to read someone’s heart or mind, and guarantee things as facts. This is why we should always give the benefit of doubt and also forgive. G-d is superior to all of us, who are we to judge His creation? Furthermore, Hashem looks at the scale we use to measure others. And with that same measure, He measures us.

Hope you all have a meaningful fast, Shavua tov!! Michael Zaroovabeli